Alcohol review (by someone who doesn't drink alcohol)

I don't drink alcohol - I mean I don't have a drinking habit (my tolerance is bad - I got red face easily), I only drink to experience different tastes.

Beer

Currently for me it's Guiness > any black beer > any white beer. All beer taste like shit (even Guinness) in room temperature (which in the Cantonia summer is like at least 25+ without air conditioner most of the year).

(Some cheap-ass Chinese white beer): My first beer. Happened when I was a kid. My parents prepared that for some kind of feast (probably winter solstice; we care a lot about winter solstice here). Tried a few sips, not good, not liking it. Basically the reason why I don't drink any beer in the first 19 years of my life.
5,0 Black Beer: Better than any white beer I've tried. The one that made me realize that I can't take white beer. Also the first beer I've had after settling in Shenzhen.
Royal Brown Ale: Worse than black beer. Would take if really desperate.
Oettinger Black Beer: Okay I guess. It's black beer after all.
(Some random Russian brand "honey-flavoured ale"): Surprisingly not bad. Ok if chilled and the weather is hot and you're thirsty.
Guinness Draught: Best beer I've tasted so far. Would take a Guinness over any black beer anytime.
Würenbacher Black Beer: Tasted okay but the thing is I tried this only a day after I've had my first Guinness (and absolutely loving it) so I might be biased here.

"Cocktail" and wine

Rio: Generic Chinese stuff. First alcohol I've bought with allowance (at the age of 15 after graduating from high school). Back in university I used to drink and write code; this is one of the two brands my student-level allowance could afford.
Bacardi Breezer: Slightly better than Rio. The other brand I've had in uni. Orange is very good after a hot day.
(The Angel's Kiss I've had at my university's café): There are two separate café/bar thing possibly run by the same student group when I was around. *Very* good. Definitely would have another one next time.
(Some big bottle white wine spritzer whose brand I totally forget): Doesn't taste like wine at all; it just tastes like random spritzer.
(Some random Chinese "white wine" cocktail): Very bad. It just tastes like very very cheap soda with alcohol. This is why I stopped drinking this kind of alcohol.
(Some random brand umeshu): One day the company I worked for offered this to everyone in the company. Really not my thing. I basically gave up on having store-bought "cocktail" at this point.
Jack Daniel's Old No.7: The first couple times were okay. Then it doesn't taste as good. I'm starting to suspect that I might not like whiskey.
(Some brand of Cape Red I couldn't recollect): It's good. Would make an okay nightcap. Too bad I don't drink (anything, not just alcohol) before going to bed.

Sake & soju & baijiu

(The sake I've had in a restaurant with an old friend in 2018): First time having sake. So far one of the best alcohol I've had. It's not like it's extremely cheap - maybe it was because I've got enough money for a undergraduate student and had nothing to worry about (unlike now). I've tried other sake later. Never found anything as good.
Jinro Chamisul soju: First soju. Tasted just like alcohol but very "round" and smooth. Didn't burn my tongue like other alcohol did.
Maotai: I once had a meal with the CEO & the CTO of the company (mentioned above in the umeshu part) and this was what they decide to drink. Very good - no wonder why people liked it. Too bad it's heavily associated with CCP and PRC (and it's goddamn expensive), definitely won't buy it just for drinking alone.

Liqueur

(Some random brand absinthe, light & dark color): I was trying to figure out how to make the perfect summer rain drink (the kind of drink you would choose to have with the cool weather when you're somewhere with a lot of greenery and it's summer and it's raining outside) and decided that it must be green, so as a shot in the dark I bought some absinthe. Absolutely loving the anise flavour - although for some reasons I was never able to make the thing properly emulsify.
Jäegermeister: My favourite one so far. (me with my basic-ass taste...)
Jameson Triple Distilled Irish Whiskey: Not liking it. Guys, I might really have a distaste for whiskeys...
Absolut Extract Cardamom: First Absolut. I thought it would taste very "dark" like Jäegermeister, but it was surprisingly light. I guess this is what cardamom liquer taste like.
Cointreau: Bitter with a *very* strong orange flavour. Very good after a heavy meal.
Spirytus: I have only diluted it with water; didn't dare to taste the raw stuff. After diluting it tastes just like some generic alcohol. Used as an disinfectant more than for drinking.

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